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REAL Stress Management for Moms of Kids Who Struggle

Tips to help you and your child reduce stress and thrive in the most challenging parenting moments.
Instructor:
Heidi Hartston, PhD
15 students enrolled
English [Auto-generated]
Get tips from a psychologist for navigating life's most stressful parenting moments like when you yell at your kid and then you hate yourself.
Effectively cope with the exhaustion, isolation and chronic worry that go with parenting a child with a learning disability or medical condition.
React helpfully when you and your child are both over-stressed.
Parent compassionately in difficult moments that feel impossible to get through gracefully.
Avoid the hurtful effects of toxic stress.
Teach and apply a "growth mindset", build self esteem, even when you or your kid mess up.
Boost self care in moments when you feel hurt by how unfair and extra hard your child's situation is.
Protect your relationship from growing distant or going negative, under stress.
Repair and re-engage your relationship. Happy, united parents are better parents.
Come back from parenting "mistakes" with effective repair conversations that model empathy, growth mindset and self love.
Teach yourself and your child empathy and respect for the imperfect, well meaning, works in progress that we all are.

As a mom you have an enormous amount of stress on your shoulders. You are the central person taking the punches and negotiating the hardest battles. If your child has a chronic difficulty like a learning disorder or medical condition, your stress can be astronomical compared to other moms. You are at high risk to fall into depression or a toxic shame cycle, particularly in those moments when you feel so overwhelmed you lose your temper, yell at your kid, and then hate yourself for it. And if the bottom drops out of your relationship, that can be the straw that breaks the camel’s back. This therapist and mom, will teach you effective tools that help you support yourself and your child skillfully in overwhelmingly difficult moments and help you bounce back from mistakes. This course provides you with REAL insights and action steps that will help you make painful situations into good secure attachment opportunities, and thrive in the toughest parenting moments. 

Limit Stress and Be Effective in the Hardest Parenting Moments.

1
Introduction

As a mom you have an enormous amount of stress on your shoulders. You are the central person taking the punches and negotiating the hardest battles. If your child has a chronic difficulty like a learning disorder or medical condition, your stress can be dramatically higher than other moms. You are at high risk to fall into depression or a toxic shame cycle, particularly in those moments when you feel so overwhelmed you lose your temper. And if the bottom drops out of your relationship, that can be the straw that breaks the camel's back. As a therapist and mom myself, I can show you effective tools that reduce stress, help you support yourself and your child skillfully in overwhelmingly difficult moments and help you turn mistakes into secure, connecting moments. This course provides you with REAL action steps that help you make painful situations into good secure attachment opportunities, and show you how to nurture yourself and your child through the toughest moments. 

Stressful situation: You Yell At Your Kid, Then You Hate Yourself

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The Stressful Situation: You Yell At Your Kid, Then You Hate Yourself

Even the best parents find themselves in this situation, you yell at your kid, with venom sometimes, and then you hate yourself for it. You are not alone in this. It happens, but you can come back from it and turn it into a good, secure attachment moment. 

2
Very Helpful Things To Know when you regret yelling at your child.

Shame hurts everyone. And shame spirals are contagious, meaning if you're in one, its possible that your child and spouse are in one too. Do remorse instead of shame, its much healthier and more productive. 

Research says its not the number of rifts in a relationship that makes it secure or insecure, its the quality of the repair. So, its not a disaster to fight and yell and mess up. What you do after the fight matters most. 

3
Specific Things You Can Do, to turn a mistake into a secure attachment moment.

Here are specific steps to take to repair a rift. Use this to make a bad relationship moment into a good one. And remember that "growth mindset" means everyone, even mom, is allowed to make mistakes. Its difficult, vulnerable but very healthy to role model self-love and patience even after you've messed up. Good people make mistakes. Even great people do. Wouldn't you like your child to be able to have that attitude too?

If Your Child Has a Learning Disorder Or A Chronic Medical Condition

1
Stressful situation: If Your Child Has a Learning Disorder or Medical Condition

If your child has a learning disability like dyslexia or ADD, or a chronic medical condition, your stress can be astronomical compared to other moms. Parenting and stress management in these situations is a completely different ball game. 

2
Very Helpful Things To Know, If You're Enduring the Stress of a Chronic Problem

We're not built to endure constant, toxic stress. If a tiger is chasing you and you escape, then you're okay. But if your child has an ongoing medical condition or learning disorder, when do you ever get to be okay?

3
Specific Things You Can Do, To Increase Self Esteem, Connection, Reduce Stress

Here are some specific things you can do to deepen your relationship and build self esteem, (for you and your child), even when there is a chronic, ongoing medical, social or learning difficulty. Use these tips to generate "post traumatic growth" instead of anxiety,  depression or post traumatic stress. 

If Your Relationship Has Gone Dormant

1
The stressful Situation: If your Relationship Has Gone Dormant

I often see couples in therapy who painfully describe feeling distant, like they're just roommates, instead of feeling close and connected like they used to be. Parents are at particular risk for this due to all the stress and overwhelm they endure. It can feel really hurtful because you need your significant other, your closest and most important supporter and listener, to be there with you. 

2
Very Useful Things To Know, If You Feel Disconnected or Like "Just Roommates"

 There are several ways high stress can make a relationship become distant. Stress and empathy block each other. That means, if you're stressed, it makes your empathy low. And, if you purposely practice boosting your empathy, your stress will be lower. 

3
Specific Things You Can Do, To Bring Back Closeness, Empathy and Playfulness

Here are specific strategies to use to wake your relationship back up and feel close again. 

Closing: Patience and Self Care Are Essential.

1
Closing: Remember you are a work in progress and deserving of love and patience.

As a mom you have an impossible job, and an enormous amount of stress on your shoulders. Nobody is perfect at this. We are all works in progress. I hope the specific action steps I've shared with you in this course will help you navigate skillfully and self compassionately in your hardest parenting moments. Remember, you are just as deserving of love and patience as your child is. 

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